Magnolia Everett King joins The IT Baby
The newest staff member of theITbaby staff has arrived and her name is Magnolia Everett King (after the tree and dirty hippies.) You’ll be hearing way too much about her tech exploits soon enough.
Magnolia’s previous occupation included being chief embryo at King Uterine operations in Nashville Tennessee and a brief career as an accidental Facebook sonogram picture upload.
Her hobbies include bleating like a goat, Jersey Shore fistbumping, laying on top of people and drooling, and incorrectly breastfeeding (although she’s getting better at that.) She also likes oversized hats and loose clothing, although that’s not particularly something that’s a safe thing to get her.
She can be reached on Twitter @magg13m00 and will be reachable via The IT Baby switchboard in the coming weeks.
Also, to cut off the rumors before they start, this is not a nepotistic appointment. She was the baby for the job and also a lead candidate after several months of open position yielded no other qualified candidates.
In the coming months we’ll see if she has what it takes to test technological solutions to common baby problems, attempt to put a non product-pushing spin on baby management, and will be featured in how-tos on common baby problems and solutions.
And if it doesn’t work out, well… too bad. She’s got tenure as part of her contract. Perhaps I shouldn’t have written that into the whole thing, but it’s been done. Stupid move on my part really.
Anyway, she’s here, and although most of my reviews and advice which were based on my experiences encountering other savage babies will now be more focused on this savage bleating beast (and perhaps the neighbor’s,) instead.
She was nine pounds, six ounces at birth, supposedly 21 inches although I’m pretty sure they messed up on the measurements as she squiggled up while the nurse wasn’t looking. She’s got a nearly full head of hair at day three. She’s awesome and absurdly loud.